Every day has its drama. Yesterday the highlight was one of my sons ran away. I was relaxing, or attempting to do so, in my home when word reached me of the escapee. I was hoping to get a brief interaction with my bed while I was still off, but this was not to be the case as I suited up and began to peruse the backwoods. I called in to discover where assistance may be needed and spent several hours jaunting about the paradise/wasteland (I reckon it’s all in the perspective of the viewer).

 

Anyhow, after several fruitless hours of traipsing about, I returned to prepare myself to officially come back on duty. It was then that I realized how tired I was. Tired, perhaps not so much physically. Tired of the idea of effort being expended in vain. Running for naught? Why bother? At every turn, we face these moments, and God says, “Do you really trust Me? Even when you cannot see the point of pressing on?” Point made.

Today I had to take a co-worker to the hospital for an appointment with a heart doctor. Along the way it became obvious that my beloved car, Breeze, was nearly dead. She got a fever halfway down the highway. By the time we reached the hospital she was sweating steam from under the hood. I shook my head as I parked, knowing that I would have to push her out of the parking space since her transmission system is weakened and her reverse no longer works. I tended to her needs with the last bit of coolant I had. Poor baby.

 

“Come on girl, you can make it home.” I said to her as I left. The smoke and the beeping was almost too much for me to bear. The temperature meter was almost maxed out, no signs of relief anywhere to be found. I sent up a prayer for my baby. The temperature steadily dropped nearly 60 degrees. Finally a place where coolant could be apprehended. Like one who carefully places a band-aid on a massive gash, I poured in all she could take until the smoking had nearly abated.

 

Almost home now. I dropped off my passenger and pulled up to my house. I turned her off a looked under her hood once more. “This is it, girl.” I said to myself as a housemate of mine came to see the cause of the smoke. I tried to find a way to calculate the cost of repairing her to be less than I paid for her, but there simply was no way that could happen. Unexpected expenses already had me in debt months earlier. Now there was clearly no way that she could be saved. No way.

 

(dramatic ending)

I fell to my knees. “Baby, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry!” I cried out. I reached my hands out to her bumper. The sweat on my fingertips evaporated against her heated metal body. I stared into her headlights as the light and life faded out of her. And then…she was gone.

 

(real ending)

With a small void in my heart, I walked inside wondering why unexpected expenses are so unexpected…and so expensive too. Soon my baby, Breeze, may be laid to rest. No money for healing, no funding for a new ride. What now?

 

And God said, “Do you really trust Me? Even when you cannot see the point of pressing on?” Point re-emphasized.

 

Trusting